At Peace

I had an incident a few days ago. I lost a friend/supporter in my life (not death) just our friendship had to end. I was so frantic about things and the character of who they called me out to be. I realized this is the enemy attacking me yet again, these are lies. I was going to fall off...my training myself... but then I realized that is exactly what the enemy wants me to do. He wants me to fail, because I have realized the closer I get to my consistencies in life the closer I am with my Heavenly Father. I love Him so much. Yesterday was a very rough day starting in the morning. I was about to give up on everything. My faith mostly... I just wanted to surrender and not believe that there is such a thing as God...because of breakup with a dear friend whom is a Christian. I couldn't believe the things that came from this person the hatred. Yes I said some awful things too. I will admit that I am not perfect. I got on my hands and knees yesterday and prayed "LORD I need physical confirmation that the lies this person was speaking into me if there is any inkling of this as truth please please let me know!!" I don't want to be this person. This person said I had a seared conscience because I told them that I was no longer believing the lies that they were speaking into me. All morning I was like what if this person is right about my "seared conscience". I then again was LORD if any of this is true please please let me know in physical confirmation. I was about to give up on everything yesterday until I was like no that is exactly what it wants. TO GIVE UP, NOT TO SUCCEED!! So I went to my Zumba class and let me tell you I was crying like a baby all the way there, I was so angry. And then about the 3rd song I just was having fun again I was free from even any of these lies. The class ended and I was about to walk out until my instructor said "Desiree' come here what's up with you?" Lately you've been leaving class without any word. She knew that I'm trying really hard to lose my weight. She is kind of my accountability partner if you can say that. She then began to speak and said "Desiree' I just wanted to Thank you for your love for people, your willingness to do anything for them, You are beautiful!! You are gorgeous." (This just made me cry more like a baby I was literally shaken and she asked me what is wrong? I said you spoke the truth to me and I asked God this morning to give me a physical confirmation about something I was told I was... and you confirmed I am not!! I was so at peace with everything. I know for sure that I am not those words this person spoke into me. That was truly from the enemy. Thank You Lord for who you are in my life! I will continue to conquer this battle of weight in my life. I am going to lose it all in one year. I vow this to you!! :)